You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize