Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize