Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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