Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Randomize
