When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
it's like iHOP with fire
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
