He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
