this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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