my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
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