how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize
