Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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