names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
