You smell like a Billy Joel song
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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