i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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