did you get engaged???
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
