was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
