Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
