GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
