I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
