: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
