I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Randomize
