I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize
