Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
