theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
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