When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
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