I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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