K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize
