areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
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