With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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