I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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