"it" just moved
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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