yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize