youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize
