He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
