New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Randomize
