he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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