Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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