my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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