Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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