well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize