are you so shy because you have an std?
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
