Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro