Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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