Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
