Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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