when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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