I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
splinters make it hard to masturbate
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
