I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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