yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
