I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
