pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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