Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
