So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
